1.06.2007

addictidiot

so i quit drinking coffee yesterday.
new year. new start. beholden to nothing.

i mean, how hard can it be?
i only drink 6 cups every morning.

yesterday, i felt like i was walking around with a wet blanket on my head. i could do nothing. in fact, in target i could not even remember the word for detergent. i looked a my roommate and said, "you know that thing with the clothes and the washing."

so without coffee, i could not
a) find words in my brain
b) open my eyes past a "high as a kite" stage
c) work out
d) go "potty"

the last one turned the trick. i have no problem feeling, looking, and sounding like a dipshit, but "potty" is a necessary- 1 hour after i wake up event- that my world revolves around. it's the reason i leave a shack attack before we can spend the day together. i love it more than i love men.

needless to say, i am drinking a cup of coffee right now.
and i feel great.
don't worry mom- i'm cutting back to 3 cups a day.

by the way, there is an FAQ archive... amazing.

on this FAQ cite I learned all about coffee.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

second best reason to remain fruitless

coffee doesn't make the magic potty anymore

me said...

wait. are you telling me that coffee no longer works after you've birthed?

Anonymous said...

while preggos

i left no stl poop in mtown